Self-will in reality a very small price to pay

[nandm]

Simple, but not easy; a price had to be paid. It meant destruction of self-centeredness. I must turn in all things to the Father of Lights who presides over all of us.

----Big Book, Bill's Story

Something that is simple has few parts. Our recovery requires we take but twelve steps. Just to the extent that we resist accepting these ideas and taking these actions are these steps difficult.

The price we pay is that thing which we hold most dear---our self-will. No longer can we center our lives, thoughts and actions on the selfish fulfillment of our desires. With God at the center of our lives we find freedom, happiness, and serenity.

Some of you may be thinking "but how can giving up my self will be a positive and healthy thing to do? How can it truly help me?"

To answer those questions one must first consider the definition of self-will. In my research I have found multiple definitions of self-will all with a common thread. Here is a sample of the definitions I have found:

• Willfulness, especially in satisfying one's desires or adhering to one's own opinions
• Stubborness: stubborn determination to hold to personal views and behavior
• Stubborn or obstinate willfulness, as in pursuing one's own wishes, aims, etc...
• Habitually disposed to disobedience and opposition.
• Self Willed: governed by one's own will; not yielding to the wishes of others; obstinate.

I think too often we tend to confuse the power of choice with self-will. When we give up our self-will to allow our Higher Power to help us what we essentially are doing is not giving up our power of choice but giving up our selfish, self-centeredness, obstinence, and stubborness.

When I look at the price of giving up my self-will to find the freedom, happiness, and serenity of sobriety; I find it a very small price to pay.

What are your thoughts?



Below is a link to an interesting article on self will and alcoholism.
http://www.janushead.org/6-2/Lockard.pdf

[barb dwyer]

For me, it's a constant thing to keep reminding myself that

'this is not my life any more.'

"I have a new employer."

and my personal favorite -

"Of myself; I am nothing."

[Cathy31]

I read something beautiful in an excerpt from a Course in Miracles that springs to mind :

"To relinquish identification with the ego and the body is to awaken our true identity...this strue identity has remained as it always was = pure spirit =- forever changless, peaceful, and at one with God, awaiting only our recognition...All power is given unto you in earth and Heaven, there is nothing that you cannot do"

It makes me think that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me...and that if I turn over my will and my life to God , each day, and remember He is running the show, i must do the footwork, then i can't go wrong! Great article, I am still mulling over it

cathy31
x

[Cathy31]

[quote=nandm;1734382][color="Navy"][size="3"]
----Big Book, Bill's Story


I think too often we tend to confuse the power of choice with self-will. When we give up our self-will to allow our Higher Power to help us what we essentially are doing is not giving up our power of choice but giving up our selfish, self-centeredness, obstinence, and stubborness.

QUOTE]

very well put I whole heartedly agree.

[Tazman53]

Great post nandm, ridding myself of self will was/is a process, I had an awakening somewhere about step 10 when I became aware that it was no longer "all" about me, I had become part of the "we", part of the world!!! I found/find my greatest highs in life in seeing others smile and succeed, what a difference.......... My joys in life were not what "I" got, but what others had gained with or without my help.

I am a far better person when I am not in charge, life is easier, I still grab the reigns every once in a while and when I do I seem to always find myself frustrated or dissappointed.

I had absolutley no idea what many in the program were talking about on this matter until I worked the steps, every day by living these principles on a daily basis and applying them to all areas of my life I am gaining a better grasp of it, I have a long way to go, but am making progress slowly.