The Promises

[RufusACanal]

Over the weeks and months, I have participated in numerous discussions concerning everything it seems except changing diapers. Waging verbal or better yet keyboard wars becomes a bit overwhelming after awhile. Granted, it can be exciting and damn near fun to drive away at a point until you or your opponent yells bloody uncle, but what does it really accomplish except maybe to prove once again that I really do not know it all.

Why do I contribute on SR? My participation is twofold; to learn and to teach. I need always remember that though I might know a thing, I can always learn a thing or three.

Of late, I have been reading and rereading the promises after the conclusion to Step Nine in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, pgs 83-84, First Edition ;

“If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves. Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.”

In order to not only understand, but experience the promises of a new life, I believe you must have worked all of the prior Steps and remained sober; in AA, I believe, there is no other way.

How have the promises been fulfilled in your life?

[Astro]

Honestly Rufus, the greatest gift that comes from the Steps is living the Promises! This is the second time I've read them today, and I'm still amazed and grateful that I live them every day.

[Freedom1990]

We just read the promises at a meeting the other night. I still struggle with fear of economic insecurity, but have taken positive steps on that by enrolling in college this fall

[stillserene]

We will be amazed before we are half way through! the Promises were one of the first things that stuck in my head when I was new in recovery and STILL inspire and give me hope today! Thanks for the reminder!

[nandm]

Originally Posted by RufusACanal

In order to not only understand, but experience the promises of a new life, I believe you must have worked all of the prior Steps and remained sober; in AA, I believe, there is no other way.

Thank you. I wholeheartedly agree with you on this.

My experience has been that the principles are brought about by the application of spiritual principles in our lives. They are not the result of merely quitting drinking and attending AA meetings. A spiritual awakening results in a change in the way we act and perceive the world around us. This way of life addresses the problems of the past and prevents new problems from arising. We have a new way of dealing even with the seeming hardships and tragedies that are a part of life.

IMHO this is the key to the promises

84:12 They will always materialize if we work for them.

We must work to build sufficient spiritual experience so that we may draw upon it when we are challenged or tempted. These profound changes in our lives come about as the result of the repeated application of spiritual principles in all areas of our lives. It works for everyone who honestly tries.

How have the promises been fulfilled in your life?

Good question. Not one that I have ever actually sat down and thought about before. Thanks for making me think.

83:22 We are going to know a new freedom and happiness

I see this in my life daily. When I made my many attempts to quit drinking without a recovery program I was insane, miserable, my outlook on life was negative, I was in self-pity, and in constant fear. Today, although I do struggle with PTSD not related to my alcoholism; I do not feel the insanity, the desperateness, the pain, and negativity I had prior to working and applying the Steps in my life.

83:23 We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.

That is a big one. I no longer fight with the shame and regrets that I had for so many years. Today I don't have to worry about who's bed I might wake up in, whether I drank enough that I wet the bed (only did that once on my last drunk, unfortunately at a "friends" house), I don't have to worry that I will wake up regretting what I have done today because I have learned to constantly check myself and apply the amends process as I go through my day. I can look at my past today and not see it with the pain that used to accompany it, today I can see it as a useful tool to help others.

83:24 We will comprehend the word serenity and know peace.

I could only dream that there was such a thing as peace and serenity when I was drinking. To me serenity meant passed out and numb. Today I understand that even when the torado that life can sometimes be is roaring around me I have tools to maintain enough sanity to know that it will pass, that it is only life things, and tomorrow is a new day full of promise. Today, I can sit by myself and just breathe.

84:1 No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.

I have found my past is one of my biggest assets when helping a newcomer. I never would have believed that prior to getting sober, I had too much shame and fear.

84:2 That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.

This way of life has given me purpose, promise, and direction in my life. None of which I had before applying the Steps.

84:3 We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. 84:4 Self-seeking will slip away

I am finally starting to understand the concept of the giver recieving more than they give. The more I give away this program the more I find I have gained myself. Such a paradox of selflessness and selfish.

84:5 Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.

I find I no longer live in self centered fear of the world. I still have areas of this that need work but I am thankful to be a work in progress.

84:6 Fear of people and economic insecurity will leave us.

I have to laugh anytime I see this one as anyone who knows my story knows I have been on both ends of the financial spectrum. Today, I am happy just where I am at. I know that my HP will meet my needs all I have to do is keep putting one foot in front of the other and doing the next right thing. Changing my focus from what I can get to what I can give has helped me to lose much of the fear regarding finances. I have come to see that money definately does not buy happiness.

84:7 We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.

There have been so many situations in sobriety that once I step away from them I look back and think wow, did I really do that? and think it in a positive way because I am amazed that I reacted in a calm, sane, rational, manner. One which I definately would not have had prior to the steps.

84:8 We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves

The truth is if I could have stopped drinking, addressed my character defects, and righted my wrongs on my own power I would have done so a long time ago. But I can only say that God did for me what I wasted many years trying to do on my own. All I have to do for proof is look around me today.

[findingout]

For me, the promises are the positive consequence of continuing to work the steps to the best of my ability. Negative consequences were never enough to keep me from drinking and I do not believe that just not drinking would have produced any kind of spiritual awakening in me or made the promises actually come true in my life.

This was not something I understood when I started. I remember saying aloud to someone, "Those people in A.A.? Well, they're just using it as a substitute for drinking!" Later on, when I realized there might a little bit more to it than that, I really wanted the spiritual life to be a theory that I could read and understand without actually doing anything else. It was only through the shared experience of many other recovered/recovering alcoholics, some kind of like me and some not so like me, that I became willing to try what they had done.

And I was, as they said I would be, amazed before I was halfway through.

[Tazman53]

Yes they have, some times quickly, and sometimes slowly, I have worked for them and they continue to come true for me, I love the promises after step 5 which I felt the wieght of the world lifted off of my shoulders!

Once we have taken this step, withholding nothing, we are delighted. We can look the world in the eye. We can be alone at perfect peace and ease. Our fears fall from us. We begin to feel the nearness of our Creator. We may have had certain spiritual beliefs, but now we begin to have a spiritual experience. The feeling that the drink problem has disappeared will often come strongly. We feel we are on the Broad Highway, walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe.

[scottnyc]

There are 12 steps, and with each step comes a promise. But you have to work the steps. It's a pity more people do not work the steps.

[bballdad]

those promises resemble Gal:5:22

[mike_mass]

The promises continue to come and go in my life to the extent that I stay spiritually grounded.

[RufusACanal]

Why are the Promises after Step 9? Could they not be anywhere else in recovery? No. In order to see the Promises let alone experience the rewards of a new life, one has to live a new life first. You do not get grass by wishing for it. You must till the ground, plant the seeds, water and nurture the plants before you receive the rewards of the fruit; unless you live close to PUBLIX. I believe that the Promises are more than spiritual rewards. The Promises are a huge roadside Billboard; an advertisement of what will happen if we work to improve our lives. Why do we continue to live and not just survive if not for the hope of growing more familiar with life and the gifts that life returns? The Promises are simply the beginning, they are not the end; they are the product of your continued work. Steps 1-9 restore our place in the scheme of life and they restore our humanity. If each Alcoholic has learned the lessons of living by not drinking again and by working the first nine steps daily, with ourselves and others, we will see the product of that work as outlined in the Promises. If you do not see the proof of your efforts, then you must go back and complete the work.