Steel on Steel

[BP44]

Jim shared in another thread his experience with Steel on Steel. I was wondering if anyone else has any experience with incorporating this discipline into their program. How did you get started? Have group members stayed commited? It seems like I recall hearing or reading in the format that Mark H provided at the FOTS 2001 conference that it is suggested that each member be well into their amends. Anyhow, just would like some feedback. An AA pal and I have been mulling it over. Have you had men only if you are male? or female only if you are female? If you included both genders, how did that work out?

[Rob B]

Steel on Steel has and continues to be an incredible experience for me. It is not always comfortable being "sharpened", but I have learned through this process that what feels bad or hurts isn't necessarily bad, same applies with good. We use a slightly modified format from FOTS 2001, I'd be happy to send you it.

I love the guys in my group, we are a diverse bunch, but we have a common problem and more importantly a common solution. We love each other enough to tell the truth. We refuse to sign the unspoken contract in contemporary AA which goes like this: "I see you are hurting, but I am not going to say annything because it might upset you or the front that I put on that goes like this,
I am way to spiritual to have any issues I'm up against These guys call me on my crap, and wake me up to stuff that I have fallen asleep to. one of the men is actually the 1st guy I ever sponsored, when he gives me considerations, I guarantee I follow through with them, I could not look him in the eye next meeting and say I have not done any work. Great example of God using my ego to actually help me grow.

[jimhere]

My experience with Steel On Steel has been good as well.

There are no real guidelines as to length of sobriety, gender, etc. I was part of a Steel on Steel group that ranged all way from five months to twenty-six years. As Mark H. has pointed out, it is rather humbling to allow a man with five months point out something to me that I've been asleep to when I'm fifteen or sixteen years sober and the rule being no attack no defend, all I am allowed to do is listen and say "thank you." I have heard of mixed groups, although I have no experience with that. I have worked with women taking them through the steps, and right now one of those women has formed a Steel On Steel group with three other women. Currently I am doing S.O.S. with three other men , two of them about eight years sober, one is twelve years, and myself, with four years. One of these men I sponsor, two are good friends, and all are seriously committed to spiritual growth. Most have found that Steel On Steel works best with no more than four people.

This is really about spiritual friendship, the company I keep. I read this quote in a little book I have called "The Company of God's Friends": "A true spiritual friend affirms without falsity and corrects without wounding."
Jim

[bballdad]

I have been wanting to find some guys here and do it.I first ran across it several yrs ago.
I am interested in your format Rob.Could you send it to me?

[29a]

If you could send it to me as well, any info you have would be appreciated

[29a]

actually check this out, it has a suggested format and lots of info http://www.xa-speakers.org/uploads/steelonsteel.doc

[RJS]

Check notice and announcement sections in your local classifieds.

[sugErspun]

Originally Posted by RJS

Check notice and announcement sections in your local classifieds.

I am not sure what you are saying. Is there something specific we should be keeping an eye out for?