a few questions

[tkdan]

Hi all, I was wondering why everytime I called the number for AA they only gave me two meeting locations now I realize that these are the two clubhouses. The meeting I went to Monday was not smoke free. At this location they have tons of meetings and all of them are smoking. The other one has both non-smoking and smoking meetings. The only thing is all of the open discussion evening meetngs are smoking. There are BB, CD, or CD, SS, and SP, non-smoking meetings available. Being new at this I don't know if any of these would benifit me as much as OD meetings. I do have other options for OD, NS meetings which I could do if that is best for now. The positive about the clubhouse meetings are the larger number of meetings held making it much easier to find meetings that work with my schedule. My question, what are the best meetings for me to attend? Should I just make the OD meetings that are available for now and after some time start going to the BB CD, or SS CD, or SP meetings?

[CarolD]

Hi Dan...
In early sobriety....I made myself a schedule.
Most of the meetings were Open Discussion
with a weekly Big Book.

I think for the first few months...
Beginners/Newcomers were the most beneficial.

I found a meeting before work made my day!
Sooo...I made a 7 .a.m. my hone group.

[Emimily]

closed discussion meetings are limited to those who admitted they have a problem with alcohol, nothing more. open discussions are ones which family and friends can attend also, you don't have to admit you're an alcoholic. if you really want to get into AA, big book studies and step studies are a great way to start getting into the literature-i've heard some folks say amazing things in a local big book study i attended. speaker meetings are important for me to go to, because i'm extroverted and it's a big thing for me to just shut up and listen to someone else's story for a while. plus, it keeps me conscious of our similarities instead of our differences... there's nothing like seeing a 56 year old dude share and realize you've done a lot of the same things.

so, that's my take on AA. go get 'em, dan-o.

[Zoobear]

I have always thought Big Book & Step Studies were the meat & potatoes of AA. Mix a few in with your OD meetings and see what you think.

[bonsai12]

As far as the AA number I would give them another call and ask them directly why they only gave me two locations. I’ve gone to some smoking meetings in my area and they are terrible. Once I get home I have to incinerate my clothing so I tend to avoid them.

In choosing meetings my sponsor brought me around to different ones. I didn’t know what was good for me OD, ST, BB, CD but my sponsor did. He never specified except that I have a regular step meeting planned, told me to break the rest up.

Well done on the meeting keep up the good work.

[mike_mass]

Wow, haven't had smoking meetings in the People's Republic of Massachusetts for ages. I would try a bunch and see what fits you best.

[tkdan]

Thanks for the replies.
Carol, morning meetings would be awsome (I'm a morning person) if I did not leave at 5:30am for work.
Em & Zoo, I do love to read and study so your advice sounds good to me.
Bonsia, I actually got a list of all the meetings in town so I've got more options now.
Mike, I was really shocked by this too, we have a city ordinance against smoking in public buildings. I guess clubhouses are not public.
Thanks for the advise all I just want to get the most out of it and it sounds like as long as I'm going to any type meetings I will benefit.

[Tazman53]

clubhouses are not public.

Bingo!!! LOL We do not have one in my area. Dan CD aka "Closed discussion" meetings are for anyone with a desire to stop drinking, OD "Open discussion" are for any one.

I would highly reccommend at least one "Beginners/Newcomers" meeting a week, they usually focus on the first three steps and early sobriety. These meetings in my area are about 50% folks with less then 6 months and the other 50% are folks with 6 months to over 30 years of sobriety. I always go to the newcomers meeting, it keeps those early days of sobriety fresh in my head which helps me stay sober and it also allows me to share with newcomers how I dealt with my early sobriety. Having only 16 months my self I also drink in the experience, strength and hope of the old timers.

I am not familiar with your area as far as AA goes, but some of our old timers prefer to stick with CD meetings, they feel they are able to open up more with folks who are fellow alcoholics.

If there are a lot of meetings in your area shop around, each meeting has its own personality, even though you may see a lot of the same folks at them. If you don't like a certain meeting go to another one.

BTW Dan since you have a desire to stop drinking you are more then qualified to go to CD Meetings.

[tkdan]

Thanks Taz, My list does not specify beginners/newcomers. Is there a way of knowing this or should I call and be specific? We do have many to choose from here so I'm sure to find what I'm looking for.

[Tazman53]

Dan I would call and ask, if they have a web presence they may give more info on the individual meetings.

The one I go to is pretty easy to tell, the Goups name is "The Beginners Goup", in line with keeping things simple! LOL

[sugErspun]

Have you heard or met anyone that you might consider asking to take you through the steps?

Meat and potatoes - yeah.

[tkdan]

Have you heard or met anyone that you might consider asking to take you through the steps?

Not yet. My father in-law has like 38 years so I doupt he has enough experience. LOL
It would be weird doing that with him. I don't mind asking him a lot of questions but I would rather it be someone not related. Of coarse I would actually need to meet more people in order to find or have God lead me to someone.

Meat and potatoes - yeah.

I'll have the meat but I will have to pass on the potatoes I'm doing the low carb thing right now. LOL
In all seriousness I believe things will happen in their own time as God wills.

[Tazman53]

Dan a relative is not a good idea, but I would bet you that he could help hook you up with a few guys as a possibility, the key is it has to be someone you trust when it comes to your 4th and 5th steps.

[sugErspun]

My sentiments exactly.

Your father in law, with 38 years in AA, probably knows a person or two.

[NoelleR]

Hey There tkdan ---

I don't know exactly where you are located, but I see that you're in Texas; did you try going to Alcoholics Anonymous , then clicking on 'How To Find A.A. Meetings' then clidcking on Texas.....? You'll can get a list of all the central, intergroup offices.....with phone numbers, and some with websites. You may also want to check out your city's 'no smoking' ordinance; here in Houston it's all non-smoking...even in clubhouses; since they allow the 'public' in, they are public.....I don't know how may clubhouses we have here in Houston, but I do know that we have over 2,000 meetings daily.....enough for anyone to find one right for him or her.....


NoelleR

[nandm]

When I started AA, I did not understand the differences in all the types of meetings so I just went to what ever meetings I could make it to and really found that I was able to learn a lot that way. Being exposed to a variety of different meetings was beneficial to me. I have since utilized meetings such a step study and Big Book meetings and have had great experiences with them. Good luck and it sounds like you are off to a great start.

[Zanthos]

I'd definitely encourage you to check out Big Book and Step Study meetings as soon as possible. Open discussion meetings are great, but for me at least, I only started to understand what AA offers and was able to begin practicing the program by getting involved with the BB and the 12 & 12. Oh, and finding a sponsor helps too!

[NOMOMERLOTMAMMA]

I love the BB meeting that I go to. Met my sponsor there, and there is a ton of sobriety. I feel like AA really opened up to me as a program once I started going to this meeting.

Good luck!!

[bballdad]

I love my home groups speaker meetings along with our big book study.When I was new,I made a lot of speaker meetings and step studies.I found them to help out a lot.

then we had a few biginners meetings where we went thru steps 1-5 and covered sponsership every month,as best we could.These meeting was suggested for those with 90 days or less sobereity.I stayed in there for my first year..if you could find one of those it would probally help..

[barb dwyer]

tk -

a good many areas don't *have* newcomers groups - often the OD meetings ... are as close to a newcomers as you're gonna get. That's how it is around here.

And - re:smoking - our building is privately owned - there4, the no smoking doesn't apply. (here)The building was donated to the club umpty-dozen years ago.
personally - I think law enforcement would just look the other way anyhow, considering they're probably arrested/incarcerated almost every single person in those meetings at one time or the other - they'd rather see the recovery- LOL

[tkdan]

Hey barb, my thought on the smoking was if they are more likely to attend if they can smoke then it is not a bad thing. I have many options that are non-smoking. The sad thing is these people were really cool. I think one day I will go back to that meeting and share sense it was my first one.
My father in-law has been great. He gave me the number of his sponser just in case I needed it, he told me he could explain the steps but I really needed to get a sponser to go through them with. I can tell he is excited that I've made this decision. He had the benefit if you can call it that of seeing me at my worst. Four years ago he had to pick my drunk butt up along with my totaled motorcycle. I'm just thankful for the people in my life whether in person or here that influenced me in this direction. I'm thankful to have a chance to live.

[barb dwyer]

*applause*

take yer time - you're in the right place, then.

[sugErspun]

Nice tkdan..

One suggestion I learned early on.

If someone gives me a phone number - I call it. Amazing things have happened because of somthing as simple as a phone call. I always thought when my sponsor would be out of town and he gave me a number to call 'just in case I needed to speak to someone' was a way of testing my willingness. But the conversations I have had, the people I have come to know through that process has been really great. It wasn't his way of testing me - it was him opening the door for me, I just had to step in.

All the best.