Morals

[Rusty Zipper]

at a beginners step 3 meeting the other night, i herd a share...

"did your parents teach you morals, and the person answered... yes!... it was said... just do the best you can do for the day" ok, no problem there...

my question is.. what if a person answers No!

any thoughts on this?

xxoo, blessings and recovery...

rz

[CarolD]

Then I qould suggest they begin tep work
to form thier own values.

And pray for them.

[ccgirl]

Rusty, I could have answered no. I had to learn everything from please and thank you right on up the big moral issues. My parents never talked to me about anything and they were not the best role models, let's just say. I don't know if it was strenght of character or what, but as I grew and became an adult, I learned my own set of morals and what worked for me.

[REZ]

I think parents teach values by the way they act, not just by what they say. So, all parents teach their children some values. The more important question is whether you want to live your life by the values that your parents taught you. Some of the values that my parents taught me are not ones I would want to live by today.

[ccgirl]

Rez; you sure did put it like I wanted it to come out. I couldn't quite find the right words. Thanks.

P.S. I really did have to learn to say please and thank you. Never learned that one at home.

[SaTiT]

I don't know RZ.
My parents taught me vaules or morals of what they thought was good.
Not exactly sure if it helped or damaged me..lol

I grew up in a different country as a child , so a lot of customs were
different, different ideas, different belief system.
But ultimately it's relatively the same. basically to be a decent human being.

I'm not sure if i have the correct set morals or not.
but I do know i have gut feeling of what is good or bad.
Not sure if good or bad are actaully proper words.

it's like this...I do know when I intentionally hurt someone or myself.
I do know when I just don't give a damn or care.
i do know when I love someone. my parents can tell me all day long not
to love that person, but that won't change the way i feel or veiw life.

There certain things the I don't agree with that my parents.
So there's a certain amount of moral or values that wasn't taught to me.

i think that's why most alki are alkis or abuse alcohol or drugs, becuase
we all know deep inside when we do wrong, so we tried numb it out.

and of course we're a product of our environment to certain extent,
But, i don't know how some people trun out different being rasied
in the same home.


but some people just don't keep a damn: alki or not, normies or not
regardless of anything

[Tazman53]

My parents lived the morals they taught me, respect, courtesy, love of my fellow man, etc. etc.

It took a lot of years for the majority of these to be washed away by alcohol, yes sir, no sir, yes maam and no maam still roll naturally off of my lips.

This gave me a big leg up once I got sober, I knew morales from my parents, all I needed to learn was how to apply them to my life again, some of them were easy, others I am still working on.

Some one who was not raised with good morales I imagine has a much tougher row to hoe then I have in recovery, prayer and setting an example are what will lead them down the proper path.

[Rusty Zipper]

thanks for the replys...

it does look like we have all learned a bit in recovery...

right from wrong, becoming adult, and hear'n our conscious...

now, if i ask this to someone out there.. i wonder what the answers would be...

maybe the blame game...

xxoo, blessings and recovery...

rz

[barb dwyer]

The differences might lie in that being taught something ...

doesn't mean you learned it ... and learning something ...

... doesn't mean you live it, or even live by it. Or near it.

[Rusty Zipper]

bd, ya got my head spin'n on that one...

funny thing, i understand what you mean...
xxoo, rz

[barb dwyer]

be afraid, Rusty ... be very afraid ...

[SaTiT]

Oh yeah. The blame game. We all did that, i imagine.
At work , at home, or at play.

belive it or not, i actaully got to a piont of getting to understand it better
..at work of course at first. we all blame each other when things don't
work out right. And we all want credit when things do work out, wheather
we did the work or not. Most people out of recovery of course.
there's ataully an old chinese proverb.
like Taz say..it's just a matter of apply it.

Being ACOA i can play the blame game all day long and blame my father
why o freaken why am the way i am. True it dose effects me,
but ultimately blaming my father won't get me anywhere.
Blame just brings me a banage job and it can be progressive as it is as alcohol.

ultimately it is about changing myself and no one else.
that takes a lot of work for a nut job like me..lol
Blames of couse would deviate me from being RESPONSIBLE.
Some people call it growning up..
but i don't wanna , wanan grow up.lol
or will, i didn't wanna, wanna stop drinking either...it just stopped working.
Will, it's like this...blame stopped working for me too.lmao

[mike_mass]

I did not have very good moral role models growing up. The steps of AA instilled these into me.

[Rusty Zipper]

maw

There is neither good nor bad until I make it so

great quote!