Daily Reflections..Comments Welcomed

[CarolD]

~*~*~*~*^Daily Reflections^*~*~*~*~*

FILLING THE VOID

We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. "Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?" As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way.

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 47

I was always fascinated with the study of scientific principles. I was emotionally and physically distant from people while I pursued Absolute Knowledge. God and spirituality were meaningless academic exercises. I was a modern man of science, knowledge was my Higher Power. Given the right set of equations, life was merely another problem to solve. Yet my inner self was dying from my outer man's solution to life's problems and the solution was alcohol. In spite of my intelligence, alcohol became my Higher Power. It was through the unconditional love which emanated from A.A. people and meetings that I was able to discard alcohol as my Higher Power. The great void was filled. I was no longer lonely and apart from life. I had found a true power greater than myself, I had found God's love. There is only one equation which really matters to me now: God is in A.A.


©Copyright 1990 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS WORLD SERVICES, INC.©

[Sheryl85]

The title alone invokes a certain train of thought. When I got here I had this feeling that I heard best described by another member as the “void” inside, Chuck C. talks about the kids calling it “the hole in your gut that the wind blows through” in “A New Pair of Glasses,” and not too long ago in San Antonio, I heard someone in a meeting call it “that bottle sized hole in their soul.” All of these things speak to that same emptiness that I had felt when I stopped drinking. It was funny that later on that “hole” got even larger when I started working the program. My sponsor told me it was because I was cleaning out all the garbage of my life by taking the Steps and it was making room for something else. She said that I had better be very careful what I allowed back into all that room I was making. I finally understood what she meant and started working all the harder on my relationship with my Higher Power. He needed to be the One I filled the “void” with.

There have been times since (in recovery) when once again I edged God out and let other things into that space. It’s funny because there always comes a point when I get that empty, longing, lonely feeling again and I realize that nothing but the presence of God can fill that chasm and make that emptiness go away.

[barb dwyer]

I'd never doubted a Power Greater than myself existed. Spent years pursuing knowledge of It, in fact.
What I have only now come to believe ... is the miracle that It cares anything about me. That ... for me ... is the miracle.