Irritated

[GreenFish]

I am getting irritated with people really quickly lately. I think when I drank I was too numb to care or notice.

[splendra]

Yea when we stop drinking and start feeling it is possible to become irratated. Be patient and gentle with yourself it is a phase that will pass. If you cannot let the other guy off the hook you will never let yourself off.

[REZ]

Yes, alcohol numbs all of our feelings--good and bad. Don't drink: this too shall pass.

[Chy]

I'm not sure how long you've been sober but if your early in recovery yea, it's pretty normal. If you've got some 1+ years then check into Post Acute Withdrawl Symptoms. ( P.A.W.S).

You think this period is fun wait for the meltdowns... LOL.. yes, this to shall pass.

[GreenFish]

I have 27 days today. Fortunately I am aware of how impatient I feel, so I am trying hard not to be that way with people.

[CarolD]

I use "How Important Is It?"

to keep myself in balance.

Blessings..

[GlassPrisoner]

Originally Posted by CarolD

I use "How Important Is It?"

to keep myself in balance.

Blessings..

Unfortunately, that makes sense

My daughter just lost her cell phone. I hardly re-acted at all. Just called the company and put a hold on the account.

Sometimes, though, little things (or big things) will set me off. I can tell when something gets to me by elevated heart rate and shaky hands. Both are results of adrenaline being released into my system.

[chip]

I found that when I put down my #1 coping mechanisms (booze & Pot), I took some time to learn how to deal with things.

I'm learning to recognize and understand my feelings. I'm also realizing that it's not so much about what happens to me...but more about how I handle it. The serenity prayer is a big help for me. Sometimes when I get upset, I repeat it over and over again....

I have to practice vigilence on a day to day basis with my thinking. I have to look at my thinking objectivly, and deal with my thoughts accorndingly. The "how important is this" guage Carol mentioned is a good one.

Often I will ask myself "why do I feel this way?" and I will try and answer it. After I have the answer to why I feel the way I do, I look at the things I can change and work on them. Everything else I try to accept.

The good news is that there are other coping mechanisms availiable to us. It just takes some time and practice at getting used to them.

When things get rough, Greenfish, please remember that "this too shall pass". Keep coming here. We're all rooting for you, and I hope you feel better soon!
peace,
chip

[barb dwyer]

hi Greenfish -
I like your posts.
With me, it's usually when something off my 'schedule' happens. Like, if they change a procedure at work
(which is constantly - do the same dang thing...just different)
or if someons hits one of my triggers
(like, if I find out they've been talking behind my back, stuff like that.)

It's as if I've become the character 'rainman' or something.
(uh oh ... time for wompner)
One thing unexpected ... and I don't know if I'm going to 'go off' (inside) or ... not react at all!
The GOOD news is - from what I've been reading about all these 'syndromes' and stuff is ... it calms down after a while.
The body has to heal, and the Spirit has to reconnect, too, it seems.
My connection with my HP is what keeps me sober.
Period.
I'm trying to learn to stop and check in with that power every time something goes flooey any more. It doesn't always work, but I'm getting better at it.

[GreenFish]

"How Important Is It?"

What if it is important?

I am doing a little better, trying to give myself some time to deal. I am trying to remember I am new at this. I am trying to remember that drinking or smoking dope will never make it better.

[chip]

You're doing the right things.

We are all in this together. I'm a profound alcoholic, and I drank like a psycho. I also smoked dope everyday. I know how rough the early part is. I'm pulling for you, Greenfish. I'm praying for you.

It's good that you are remembering the right things; drinking and smoking dope will make everything worse. The serenity prayer really helps me out in times of struggle. Sometimes I must remind myself to stay in "the now" and accept the things I cannot change.

I go through cycles myself, as many people on SR know.... I have rough days and good days. The important thing is that they are all sober days. It's nice to come here, or go to a meeting, and "dump" my bad feelings. Keep posting and sharing... You shouldn't carry the weight around with you.

I suggest that you share your issues with sombody (a sponsor, a friend, clergy...someone). You might feel better if you talk about the specifics with someone.

I hope you have a peaceful night, and a good sober day tommorow.
your buddy,
chip

[GreenFish]

Thanks Chip, I appreciate our help :-)

[fraankie]

well, that's why we go to meetings
so
we can see how sober people act


best
fraankie

[findingout]

Originally Posted by fraankie

well, that's why we go to meetings
so
we can see how sober people act


best
fraankie

For some reason, this made me think of this quote from the movie "The Big Chill"

Sarah: I know he wasn't happy. That doesn't tell you much. I'd no idea how bad it was. I think he purposely wanted to cut off from all of us because he was so unhappy with where he was at.
Karen: Is that true, Chloe? Did you feel that?
Chloe: I don't know. We had some good times. I haven't met that many happy people in my life, how do they act?

And I remember why I really do need to spend time around recovering people... just to see how it is done on a daily basis. Thanks fraankie.

Glad you are still with us GreenFish

[fraankie]

just thought of it

act "as if"

even though you are grumpy, down, irritable
it's the holidays
and
act "as if" you are enjoying them

ho-ho-ho



best
fraankie

[chip]

I like hanging out with people who are *real*. Like the honest nature of this thread. Since coming to AA, I've been peeling away the barriours I put up. I like the people we *talk* with here because we share what we are feeling and thinking.

I think it's great that you and I can talk about our feelings. It's a big change from my "drinking buddies". The depth of conversation and friendship in/around AA cannot be compared to anything else. We are all bound by the unity of recovery. We are brothers and sisters.

Greenfish, keep posting when you have a rough time. You may not know it, but you are helping others when you share. You've helped me stay sober today. Keep up the good work!
chip

[Tazman53]

greenfish I must be a real oddball here! (Nothing new for me! LOL) I was not a violent drunk (Thank God), but I had a very short fuse and usually about the dumbest things you can imagine. My lashing out was all verbal and like I said it was normally about little stupid things that did not matter. This caused my kids to have to respond to me in kind, their lack of respect for me due to me being drunk all the time really burned me up and I was so out of it I did not understand why they had no respect for me.

Now that I am sober I refuse to argue or even raise my voice with any one, there is a peace that comes over me, I make my point and let it go. My kids now do not argue with me, they have learned it is futile and they now respect me and what I say. Why? Because I am sober and not flying off the handle.

Greenfish everyone is different, I stuck strictly with booze, I guess it is possible that the grass mellowed you out, or as you said numbed you to what was going on, which may explain the difference. I used to smoke dope and drink when I was much younger and may have continued to do so but had jobs that required drug tests so I switched strictly to booze which kicked my butt but good!

I agree with saying and living the Serenity prayer, in cases of anger I say it slowly and think about how each part applies to the thing I am dealing with at the time. If there is nothing I can change about the situation then there is no need to be mad, if I can do something about it then rather then get angry I simply do what is needed to do to take care of it.

AA is a program of action, but not reaction! As I like to say all things are done one day at a time, I need to try and apply all 12 steps when needed to analyze what is going on and to take action to, if I can, remedy the problem, if I have no control over it then I simply accept it, pray for relief from its effect on me and move on.

[GreenFish]

Everyone here is such a big help. I am looking at the folks who I thought were friends, and finding out how superficial those relationships are. We keep each other at a distance so no one can hurt us.

I am also very sad today.

[Tazman53]

Greenfish I find I am much happier the more time I spend with my family (sober) and with people like me, recovering alcoholics. I have learned who my real friends are since I quit drinking and who are merely drinking buddies.

Drinking buddies are nothing but fair weather friends I have found who if I am not drinking are not my friends.

[GreenFish]

It is way more than just drinking buddies. I "got away" with my drinking because I tend to surround myself with people who are not very observant. I really capitalized on that when I was drinking, so I guess I shouldn't be so annoyed with folks now that I am sober. I don't know if that makes any sense...

[CarolD]

I do know that the friends I have made in AA
are the most
strong.. supportive... caring people I have ever found.

As a group..simply awesome!

Mega Hugs GF