Working the Steps 2 & 3

[c'est la vie]

Step 2

Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.


I can remember many occasions during childood that I wished to go to church and would go sometimes with friends. I wanted to have a relationship with God and didn't know how. I didn't relate this to drinking until college when I went through a bad spell of drinking to numb my pain (not just partying) and a teacher requested a private meeting with me. She told me she could sense something wrong and gave me a Bible. She gave me some suggestions of what to read, how to read, and how to pray. It was an amazing thing and I prayed so hard and so often. My pain was greatly lessened and my life went on. I still drank but the "drink to death" attitude was lifted.

I let that reliance on God go to the wayside as things in my life glided by without any terrible events happening. I went to church sporadically for the next 16 years and questioned my faith. The few times I went to a Bible study with a friend I bawled my eyes out because I could feel the faith but was scared to give my life over, so I didn't go again.

I have no doubts now that God can and will restore me to sanity. I've seen it happen in the past in my life and I see it in the people in my meetings. As written in the 12x12, "We saw them meet and transcend their other pains and trials. We saw them calmly accept impossible situations, seeking neither to run nor to recriminate."

[c'est la vie]

Step 3

Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him.


I am willing to try to do God's will and ask for guidance frequently. The 12x12compares willingness to the key that opens the door of opportunity for sanity. Fortunately it also recognizes how confusing or difficult that may be for some. It says that the "effectiveness of the whole AA program will rest upon how well and earnestly we have tried to come to a decision to turn our will and our lives over to God...".

My problem will be that I'm not sure how to do that exactly. I understand that "once I placed the key of willingness in the lock and have the door ever so slightly open, we find that we can always open it some more." I take comfort in the fact that just my small amount of willingness will get things started. I'm hoping that as I grow in my faith and understanding, the door will open further.