new here - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

livewir · 09-02-2003, 06:02 PM

Hey all,

I dont know where to start, My mother is a recovering alcoholic and has been sober for just over 2years. The problem is I dont know who this person is, she is so different . I find myself snapping at her when i should be helpfull . I get so angry at her for her just trying to be her . I just dont know what to do.

I was hoping maybe this is a place I can talk about it and maybe get some help dealing with this anger and my past .

thanks.

journeygal · 09-02-2003, 06:09 PM

Hi Livewir and welcome!

You can definitely talk about your anger, past, and any other issues you want to bring up here. A lot of us have been where you are and can definitely relate to how you're feeling. So please feel free to come back, vent, and share with us all you want!

Take care and hugs,
JG

JT · 09-03-2003, 08:07 AM

Welcome and make yourself at home!

Recovering is hard on all of us. What we hoped for was all good and we find that things have not really gotten much better after all. They just changed.

Hugs,
JT

Peter · 09-03-2003, 09:22 AM

Welcome livewir.

It's been said that "alcoholism is a family disease."

A parents drinking has a profound effect on the children so when that parents srtops drinking and starts recovering the new changes can sometimes be difficult for the other people in the family to cope with.

If you are not averse to doing it I would like to suggest that you check out some of the other Twelve Step programmes like Al anon or Acoa.You may be able to gain some wonderful insight on the nature of alcoholism and recovery and also pick up some valuable coping information.

If you do not feel ready for that right now please feel welcome here.We are always happy to hear from you.

daffy · 09-30-2003, 02:24 PM

Hi Livwir, My mother used to drink too, it's only been in the last 10 years that she has been sober, not because she attended any AA meetings, but she was seeing a guy who she's married to now, that gave her the ultimatum booze or him. Now she goes to bible study classes and has turned into a completely different person. She's still pretty good at trying to lay a guilt trip on us kids and trying to control and manipulate. For a very long time I carried alot of anger around at her because she wouldn't help me sort out some issues I had ( my stepfather molested me from the time I was 6 until I was 14). She refused to believe me. Only since a month or so ago when I started posting on this forum and I began reading, did I decide to let it go. Because it really does block all the good things that could be happening to you. I had to let the problem be hers. I need to grow up and I am trying. I wish you well in your quest to know this new person. Your here though and it's a great start. Take care, daffy

09-02-2003, 06:02 PM	#1 (permalink)
livewir Paused Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Chicago Posts: 1	new here Hey all, I dont know where to start, My mother is a recovering alcoholic and has been sober for just over 2years. The problem is I dont know who this person is, she is so different . I find myself snapping at her when i should be helpfull . I get so angry at her for her just trying to be her . I just dont know what to do. I was hoping maybe this is a place I can talk about it and maybe get some help dealing with this anger and my past . thanks.

09-02-2003, 06:09 PM	#2 (permalink)
journeygal believer Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: walking in faith Posts: 1,023	Hi Livewir and welcome! You can definitely talk about your anger, past, and any other issues you want to bring up here. A lot of us have been where you are and can definitely relate to how you're feeling. So please feel free to come back, vent, and share with us all you want! Take care and hugs, JG __________________ Whether they find recovery or not, we survive...and then we thrive. ~Gabe

09-03-2003, 08:07 AM	#3 (permalink)
JT Supply Manager Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Cleaverville Posts: 2,899	Welcome and make yourself at home! Recovering is hard on all of us. What we hoped for was all good and we find that things have not really gotten much better after all. They just changed. Hugs, JT __________________ The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind~Wayne Dyer

09-30-2003, 02:24 PM	#5 (permalink)
daffy Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: anytown usa Posts: 24	Hi Livwir, My mother used to drink too, it's only been in the last 10 years that she has been sober, not because she attended any AA meetings, but she was seeing a guy who she's married to now, that gave her the ultimatum booze or him. Now she goes to bible study classes and has turned into a completely different person. She's still pretty good at trying to lay a guilt trip on us kids and trying to control and manipulate. For a very long time I carried alot of anger around at her because she wouldn't help me sort out some issues I had ( my stepfather molested me from the time I was 6 until I was 14). She refused to believe me. Only since a month or so ago when I started posting on this forum and I began reading, did I decide to let it go. Because it really does block all the good things that could be happening to you. I had to let the problem be hers. I need to grow up and I am trying. I wish you well in your quest to know this new person. Your here though and it's a great start. Take care, daffy __________________ musicmom

09-03-2003, 09:22 AM	#4 (permalink)
Peter Moderator Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Leaving Sparta Posts: 2,928	Welcome livewir. It's been said that "alcoholism is a family disease." A parents drinking has a profound effect on the children so when that parents srtops drinking and starts recovering the new changes can sometimes be difficult for the other people in the family to cope with. If you are not averse to doing it I would like to suggest that you check out some of the other Twelve Step programmes like Al anon or Acoa.You may be able to gain some wonderful insight on the nature of alcoholism and recovery and also pick up some valuable coping information. If you do not feel ready for that right now please feel welcome here.We are always happy to hear from you.

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