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I've only experienced sex sober for the first time in my life this past year. At 33 years old....I've discovered my sexuality...and I don't want to lose it!!
It's so different from what I considered sex while I was using. Then it was a series of difficult feelings..guilt, shame, anger, revenge. Very rarely was it what I would consider "making love". Especially in the last few years of drinking, when it consisted of drunken hook-ups with strangers -not only dangerous and possibly life threatening- but the shame the next day was overwhelming. The guilt of having cheated again was overwhelming. And the fear of getting diagnosed with a disease was beyond overwhelming. This is what I thought was sex?!?!
For me, it's another rock solid reason to not use. To have discovered that I have been missing out on this vital part of a woman's life for the fleeting pleasure and long-lasting misery of drinking was like a shock of cold water in my face.
Sober sex is on my short list of why I'm staying sober.
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