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Dear Patrick,
The others have already given you my suggestions, but I felt I had to respond. I have found it very difficult to be "a regular person" since I got clean and that was 14 years ago. I do have clinical depression, but I don't think that's the whole answer.
Although I wouldn't want to be using (unless of course they made cocaine that was not harmful to you and not addictive, etc.,etc., etc.), I sometimes feel myself removed from the people around me. I don't know why that is, but I like some insight into it.
I'm glad you see a therapist. I did for years, and he was very helpful.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Carol
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