Pattee, I know what you have been through, and sometimes I think our emotions get stuck, which can be a safety valve sometimes too. Sometimes the pain is too much to bear all at once, so little spells of grief and sadness slip out, and the rest remains for another time.
Perhaps the fact that these people are leaving to attend the funeral of someone else who has died from the disease, has triggered something that is telling your emotions to shut down or numb out for now, until you can handle the sadness that comes each time an addict dies.
It's good that you recognize that something seems off, that you feel the coldness and know there is a reason.
I don't know you well enough to suggest anything to help relieve it, except to maybe keep your support around you and allow yourself to grieve a little more and let some of the pain flow.
My prayers go out for you, and lots of hugs and love.
