Hi folks, Still new to this board, although not newly sober. After 11 years, one would think I had this temper thing licked, but tonight I let my husband have it about "stuff" I had been let build up for weeks.
I started off with a "discussion" and ended up screaming and yelling like I used to do when I was drunk and newly sober. Suffice it to say, it wasn't pretty. When this happens I have the oddest sense of being on the outside observing myself become the antithesis of serenity. Sigh.... Have I been to many meetings in the past few weeks? Nope. Have I been meditating much lately? Ah... no. Have I been asked my HP to remove my character defects? Not so much. Now, in hindsight, I can see that I was wanting to control some situations in my family life, and wanting my husband to behave the way "I" thought he should. Humbling, but true.
Time to open up, attend more meetings, make some amends, and sit and be quiet with God. Sharing here is a start.
Thanks for listening. No one understands an alcoholic like another alcoholic!
Leslie