[Mel77]

So I have been a member here for awhile. I joined because my girlfriend at the time is an addict. She suggested i join and thought maybe some things here would help. I didnt post, but i read, and now i need help.

We were together for almost 3 years, she has two children from previous relationships. I fell in love with her and the boys the moment i laid eyes on them. I considered the boys my own.

My problem is that we have since gone our seperate ways and i dont know how to deal with it. There is alot to the story, she relapsed, cheated, lied several times during our time together. I forgave her the best i could. Now she has a new guy that she is seeing and it is killing me. I dont get to kiss the boys goodnight, or tell them how much i love them. It is really hard when i see them now because i know i will just have to leave them again.

Friday night i took alot of pills and my sister-n-law found me. My family ended up calling 911 and i was taken to the er. My stomach was pumped and i was not aloud to leave until my parents agreed to take me home with them. So now i am staying at there house under constant supervision. I have a house of my own, but i cant stand to go to it because all i see is my old family. Everything reminds me of them.

I dont know how to get over the pain. I dont know how to get past wanting to hurt her the way she has hurt me. Any ideas would be great. Sorry this is so long.

Mel