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Thanks everyone. I am going to a therapist, I see her twice a month. She specializes in cognitive therapy. It is still so good to have your words of encouragement however. I was always the good girl - at my last job they called me Saint "RealNameHere". I had the vows of a nun, for heaven's sake. LOL I never got into ttrouble before my five year drinking binge which got me into recovery. And NEVER any problem with the law until now. I am learning to see myself differently, I guess. The meds do help a lot. I have a half an acre, and I spent today working in my gardens, reading, and bird watching. I could never sit still long enough to do that before. One step at a time. I am going to copy your words into a recovery book of notes I keep of encouragement I can read when I need it... There is one good thing about my bipolar diagnosis...I was advised by my doctors to limit unnesesary stress. I've cut back on my overtime at work, and just dumped my boyfriend because he was abusive. It is beginning to feel good taking care of myself, not just doing everything I think everyone wants me to and then trying to fix myself later from the damage.
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