| Me too...
Hi there!
You are not alone. Diagnosed 8 years ago as bipolar, I have had an ongoing battle with this crappy illness.
At the same time I have learned huuuuuggggeeee lessons from paying attention to my behavior and also the behavior of others around me.
What I mean is that even from an early age (8) I knew that something about my moods and actions were a bit more severe and intense than the average bear.
By the time I was 20, I had an extreme alcohol problem, sexual promiscuity, self-abusive outbursts, and long periods of isolation...
You may feel familiar, with some or a lot of these problems.
The more insane my life had been getting, the more afraid I became...which is good because that fear forced me to seek help.
The hospital was the first step in my long list of reaching out attempts.
After that I went through four years of denial and going on and off of medications ( I tried at least twenty different prescriptions) and I am not exaggerating.
Through the years following, I decided that I was tired of wanting to be "normal" so I gave in and accepted that I have an illness, just like if I were diabetic and needed insulin.
Explaining this to people that aren't familiar with mental illness is like speaking a language that is foreign to them.
This can be very discouraging, especially if that someone is a person you look up to and respect or depend on.
This is getting to be long, I will write more again here later....
Love Sidra
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