[aasharon90]

Hi ducky. Im Sharon and Im an Alcoholic. I am also an adult child of an Alcoholic.

Glad u r here.

Ive been tackling my alcoholism for the past 15 yrs with little attentions paid to my childhood issues. They have surely paid a huge price in my own marriage.

Anyway....I think u r a special young lady. Esp. for recognizing what is going on around you and reaching out for help. That takes a strong willed person to do that. If u were my child, i would be extremly proud of you. : )

I too went thru physical, emotional and verbal abuse at the hands of my own mom. I still feel uncomfortable talking about her, maybe because its not right taking someone elses inventory, and thus i still have some admiration for her.

At the time i was little i couldnt tell u that because there was soooo much anger and hatred towards her. She was the Dr. Jeckel/Mr. Hyde type personality. She held on to a good job and always looked beautiful until the the false face and layerings were removed.

She brought the abuse that she endured as a child with her and infected her own family, thus the chain of abuse continued. I one out of 4 kids was chosen to carry that torch. But......for some WONDERFUL, AWESOME reason the chain was hopefully broken by me.

I entered my own marriage drinking with no idea i was an alcoholic. Of course in time my behavior spoke volumes. I have 2 BEAUTIFUL SMART children who r now attending college and thru the Grace of my Higher Power whom i choose to call God, spared me from abusing them.

When i was young like u, i had already been abuse as a little one. I took on the role as an adult and care taker and much more. More than any child should ever have to. I felt like my childhood was ripped from me many times even tho we did everything as a family. It was just i was singled out with the abuse.

There were a few times when i tried to reach out for help. This was in 9th Grade and my only closest friend l had knew of my abuse and talked me into seeing the guidance councilor. I had an apointment set up to go and chicken out due to the fear that overwhlemed me. If my mom EVER found out that i told them about the way she beat me, leaving whelps, bruises, torn flesh, black eyes, busted lips, then my life was over.

NO CHILD SHOULD EVER EVER have to endure such pain. NO CHILD..! Thats why it hurts me so to hear of little ones today on the news being tortured, abuses and thown away.

For u little one....again i comment u for reaching out. There r many times i think about a child at night hurting and just wish just for a moment to let them not hurt. To give me their pain so they can sleep peacefully or not go hungry and would gladly accept it.

My 2 children who r 19 and 21 know about my disease and have shared with them that if they should ever find themselves in a situation dealing with drugs or alcohol that there is help available. There r people here to help them and to know that they never have to go thru anything alone.

So little one , u r in a good place to recieve even for a moment, peace understanding, love and care from many wonderful recovery people here in SR.

So continue to post and read and message me if u ever need someone to talk to. Ive walked in ur shoes and certainly understand what u r going thru and how u r feeling.

Thanks for letting me share.