Hi Ya Rat,
I don't know what your idea of an alcoholic is but if you think you are alcoholic, you probably have good reason. It's something to check in to.
At any rate, this is a good place to come to. Don't forget to check out some AA meetings and get to know some folks there. If you tell them what you've told us, you'll get the help you need.
Take care and keep coming back.
