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Hi Leem,
The fact is, where he's concerned, you are helpless. You can spend countless hours trying to influence him in all sorts of ways, but until he's ready to do something about his drinking, nothing's going to work. He's lived his life to this point, hearing and seeing the results of his drinking, and still, he drinks. He's selfish and self-centerd. That's the problem! The people who say "don't let him hit his bottom," actually think they can say something or do something to make him change. My wife and I went through this period with our son. We let him know we loved him but he wasn't allowed in our home unless he called first and was clean and sober. We didn't give him any aid whatsoever, unless it was to go to a meeting, or rehab. Like the old saying goes, "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink." We can however, say and do things to make him thirsty. But, that's all. Yes, people die out there drunk, and their loved ones go for years wondering if they could have said or done something to change him. The answer is still, "not unless he wants to change." People go to rehab every day, dry out and then when they feel better, go right back to the old watering hole. He has to want to not drink any more and be totally willing to do whatever it takes to achieve that end.
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