Hey,,
I was looking back at your post from when you were doing SO much for your mom, to help her get off the drugs.
Did she ever go to an NA meeting? Did you ever get to any meetings?
That might really help her, and you as well..
Remember I posted the link to what addicts do?? Here it is for you.
What Addicts Do
My name's Jon. I'm an addict. And this is what addicts do. You cannot nor will not change my behavior. You cannot make me treat you better, let alone with any respect. All I care about, all I think about, is my needs and how to go about fulfilling them. You are a tool to me, something to use. When I say I love you I am lying through my teeth, because love is impossible for someone in active addiction. I wouldn't be using if I loved myself, and since I don't, I cannot love you.
My feelings are so pushed down and numbed by my drugs that I could be considered sociopathic. I have no empathy for you or anyone else. It doesn't faze me that I hurt you, leave you hungry, lie to you, cheat on you and steal from you.
My behavior cannot and will not change until i make a decision to stop using/drinking and then follow it up with a plan of action.
And until I make that decision, I will hurt you again and again and again.
Stop being surprised.
I am an addict. And that's what addicts do.
That's just the first post in the very long thread. It is a sticky, on top of the page in the
Nar-anon page.
I am only putting this up for you, to let you know that what your mom is going through, she is not doing to you.. It is
What addicts do, she needs to get some more help. Addiction is a tough disease. Opiates are a tough battle.. You crave them for a long time, and they are so sneaky, because you can take them for a really long time, and NO ONE knows, it's not like alcohol, or alot of other drugs, no one notices... Well, until the drug turns on you, and of course, it doesn't matter who you are, the drug does turn on you eventually. Eventually, people begin to realize that something is wrong,
because the drugs begin to affect your body, and even your mind. They did mine. But, for a long time, a person on opiates can get away with taking them, and no on will notice..
Do you know where she is getting them from????
The INTERNET?? The doctor??
A dealer??
First, she needs to really want to stop, or you can't really do anything to help her. But if she wants to stop, to help her, you could, get rid of her Credit cards, ( if she gets them on the net),,
or , call the doctor that is giving them to her, ( if she is getting them from a doctor,),,
OR,,
Call the police on the dealer, ( if she is getting them from a dealer, if you know who it is.. ).. Be careful with that one.. That could be dangerous.
But this stuff will only work if she is ready to stop. She also needs to get some extra help. Maybe a Treatment center?? She tried to do it on her own, with your help, she just couldn't stay clean, so maybe it's time to get into a treatment center?? That can be a very good idea. It gives people a great start. I know I did benefit from the treatments I was in..
Well, I hope something here helps you..
I do hope your mom is ready for help. Maybe she just isn't ready yet. That can be hard to swallow,, but sometimes, we just aren't ready..
Do you know there Serenity Prayer?? That might be a good thing for you to start saying for yourself,. It might really help you. Addicts are so hard to deal with.. I am sorry you are going through this.. I am also sorry your mom is going through this. Just know that she doesn't mean to be an addict, it's just what she is..
My prayers go out to you..
Love,
Becky