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***cmc*** · 02-04-2006, 07:47 AM

Taira,
I have been there with a few different circumstances- I am so proud of you! You are giving your Dad a great gift, your love- I will pray for you. It is so normal for families to be at odds in these circumstances. I was wondering how old your kids are- it could be that maybe they can handle seeing Cathy this way- You will know what is right for them. When my dad had lung cancer it let my kids see him almost up to the end- we lived about 2 hrs away and I left them alot to spend time with him. When it spread to his brain and he was really acting crazy I did not take them again- had a 4 year old and thought it would be too traumatic- dad looked really scary and I just couldn't do it to the kids
He died with me, his health aide and a hospice admin at his side, in his living room where he had lived for several months. I don't regret what I did- if you can sort things out and think of how you will look back on it- it might help you. PLEASE TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF!!!!
Even though the step mom is a problem- you have every right to be there and have peaceful moments with your dad. I think that a talk with the patient advocate or whatever hosp personnel they have there, would be good. Your dad deserves to have you there, to be protected from all the crazy behaviors of your step mom. She will not understand due to her use- and you may be placed in a position of authority because of her drinking. Does your dad have a durable medical power of attorney? Even if he does, and C. is his rep.- if she is not able to be sober, she cannot be allowed to be in charge of him. It is a hard situation you are in- Iwill pray for wisdom and strength for you.

02-04-2006, 07:47 AM	#6 (permalink)
*cmc* Community Greeter Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: FL Posts: 13,701	Taira Taira, I have been there with a few different circumstances- I am so proud of you! You are giving your Dad a great gift, your love- I will pray for you. It is so normal for families to be at odds in these circumstances. I was wondering how old your kids are- it could be that maybe they can handle seeing Cathy this way- You will know what is right for them. When my dad had lung cancer it let my kids see him almost up to the end- we lived about 2 hrs away and I left them alot to spend time with him. When it spread to his brain and he was really acting crazy I did not take them again- had a 4 year old and thought it would be too traumatic- dad looked really scary and I just couldn't do it to the kids He died with me, his health aide and a hospice admin at his side, in his living room where he had lived for several months. I don't regret what I did- if you can sort things out and think of how you will look back on it- it might help you. PLEASE TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF!!!! Even though the step mom is a problem- you have every right to be there and have peaceful moments with your dad. I think that a talk with the patient advocate or whatever hosp personnel they have there, would be good. Your dad deserves to have you there, to be protected from all the crazy behaviors of your step mom. She will not understand due to her use- and you may be placed in a position of authority because of her drinking. Does your dad have a durable medical power of attorney? Even if he does, and C. is his rep.- if she is not able to be sober, she cannot be allowed to be in charge of him. It is a hard situation you are in- Iwill pray for wisdom and strength for you.