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Hey Skinner...
I think I get it. I think what step 3 is trying to do is give me hope... hope that I'm not alone and that my "higher power" is going to somehow save me. I guess what I'm trying to get my brain around is what I believe that higher power to be. If it is hope... hope for my future, hope for my living a better life without alcohol, hope for living a balanced and whole life... well I do have that. I am very hopeful for my future. I have a belief within myself that I will make it through this and come out on the other end okay and stronger for it. Do I attribute that to any God or any being that is conciously guiding me through this? Not really... I attribute it to the fact that I don't want to lose the joys that are precious to me... that I got sick and tired of not having any sort of control over myself because of my attraction and abuse of alcohol... and that I wanted and believe I can do better than I have been doing. Does that mean my "higher power" is simply my hope for a healthy self? Is that just my ego saying it's my desires and not my "higher powers" sublime divine plans for me? I think it's more egotistical of me to think that some dude up there in the cosmos is lookin down at me goin' "yo I have divine plans for you so stop muckin em up with booze".
Am I answering my own questions? Damnit someone gimme the cliffnotes for The Big Book please. I need the answers in the back :P
Babbling...
Suga
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