{{{MC}}}
Sounds painfully like me + MY mom - 'cept I'm 47 now.
I was diagnosed bi-polar when I was 23yo, have been sober in AA for almost 14 yrs.
Not sure I have any wisdom to offer you - except to say that my mom's unfailing love and emotional support has meant the WORLD to me these past 25 yrs. It has meant ALOT to me to have her acceptance.
It also causes me great pain (anxiety!) to know that my actions hurt her and cause her to worry about me. In the past it's been extremely difficult to share info with her about my meds, my pdoc, my counselor - for that reason. Especially when I'm being non-compliant.
For me, becoming functional in spite of my BP, has been alot like getting sober has been. I had to 'hit bottom', I had to be so scared and full of pain that I was FINALLY WILLING to do whatever it takes to get the BP 'in control'.
Well THAT'S not very helpful and supportive is it?!?
I'm a mom too. My son is 28yo and has bouts of major depression. It's sheer agony to 'watch' - ALL I can do is give him my emotional support, my praise for what a fantastic person he REALLY is - - - and maybe suggest he put a call in to his pdoc. It's HARD! I'd do anything to be able to "FIX" him!
And then I begin to understand how my mom must feel at times.
The love and unwavering acceptance of one's mom, means soooo much. It doesn't always *feel* like it's very much (to the mom) - but I think it's ALWAYS more than that.
Say a prayer for her, trust her enough to let her fall and figure it out - (cuz no matter how many people have told me things over the years, I STILL had to figure it out for myself) - love her, be willing to listen without judging -
and MOST of all, take care of YOU. You're doing so much MORE than what you realize!
Bright Blessings,
Blue