I'm quite sure his mental issues contribute to his addiction, the same works in reverse. They are both a strain on our relationship and neither make it easy to trust him. The mental issues though are easy to read when they present themselves ie there is a definite pattern to his moods. The addict in him is the toughest to handle because he is sneaky and manipulative, praying on my lack of knowledge about the drug and how it affects him as well as my hopes and trust that the work he has done will continue to encourage him to stay clean.
As for him using the argument as an excuse, yes I'm aware that you can't make someone do something they don't want to shy of holding a gun to their head. So I feel no guilt for insisting to see his finances, my gut told me something was off and after this long I've learned to trust that instinct.
The amount of coke he did this weekend bears no meaning. He said he bought an ounce but who knows and I surely don't care. The fact that he used and said that he used once before a few weeks ago is what matters to me. It is clear that he has fallen back into using substances as a coping mechanism and that is a hard no for me. Since this happened we have not spoken and since I'm also aware that his meds won't function properly due to his use I have no intention to speak to him anytime soon.
It sucks to love someone more than they love themselves...