Starting the Program
I finally realized today that I have to start the 12 step program with a sponsor. Nothing else has worked for me.
I had five years sober starting 11 years ago. That was on my own. Then I started drinking again.
Over the last 2 years I have sporadically gone to meetings. I even have stumbled onto a place that has meetings all the time. It's a facility that is just for AA and AlAnon. So they have a pretty strong group that is regular.
So here are my reservations.
First of all I just don't like the big book. The way it's written really puts me off. It really annoys me when people treat it like it's the words of God.
Second, I hate the idea of a sponsor. But I realize now that I can't do this alone so I've got to let others into my life in order to make this change.
I've been in meetings where people talk about working the steps even though they may not know why they are working the steps. they say the steps can work anyway.
So that's what I'm going to do.
I figure I better be honest with my sponsor about my reservations.