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Erratic, I really sympathize. I used to drink and it makes us borderlines a lot worse. If you stop drinking, you'll have a chance at gaining some control over your life. I know it's very difficult. But it's doable. It really is. Have you considered checking into a detox? Getting therapy or going to whatever type of group suits you? You have to replace the drinking with something else. Are you at the point where you will be in physical withdrawal? If that's the case, then detox. If not, then it's putting other things in your life to replace the drinking-positive things. Things that you enjoy doing. And getting support. Best of luck and keep posting.
Sincerely, Cate.
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If you're going through hell, keep going.
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