depression hitting me hard
hi i am a young 21 year old who is dealing with depression i have just started taking paxil to try and help and it doesnt help that my boyfrind of ten months has a 6 months old with a another girl. i think this has something to do with it i hate the child i dont ever want to see it and i hate him for it i just cant get over it i think its the depression thats why i finally got help i have wicked thought s of burning her house down or killing both of them i think of murder and suicide on a daily basis and think of killing myself just to get out of this situation i know this is not healthy but i dont know what to do i love him yet i have this evil mental block i see so many other happy integrated families it wouldnt be so bad if she wasnt such a lying fat ugly B*tch and wonder why cant i . i have tried even the mention of his kids name makes me cry commercials make me cry i have dealt with this illness for years even attempting suicide three times i dont want to do it again and succeed this time can someone please offer me advice.
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