[Millwallj]

Sometimes, for me, the programme boils down to me becoming humble - no worse, no better - than anyone else. As I am sure you are aware, it is common for alkies to say that they feel 'special and different' to all those around them.

And so, after two years sober, my grandiosity improves each day toward humility - knowing that I am not hugely special or hugely different to the rest of the human race.

But there seems to a be a paradox - as most of the AA programme insists that the disease of alcholisim has put us seperate from the human race as 'mentally and bodily' different from our fellows. Now I know that AA is a programme of personal interpretation and some people would say that we are different in drinking only. But what is the same as our fellows and what is different. Or what are we trying to defeat that is human and what are we trying to defeat that is alcaholisim?

The point I am trying to make is that a feeling of being seperate, personalised, unique, smarter, different to others is, maybe, perfectly natural and is a part of everyones lives - everyone human being maybe - to a greater or lesser degree, feels seperate and unique from others. So is it a little extreme to focus my energy on 'getting rid' of this 'defect' when doing that could, actually, make me totally different from others. In that by becoming "humble" I have some how perverted my own pschology?

Extreme I know, but its a question that nags me at meetings and worries me somewhat as I am only 24 and need to live as nature intended me.

My sponsers quip was dont worry about it until it causes pain and then look at it. Dont try and think your way into humility, its impossible.

What is others views of 'becoming humble' and do they worry about it like I do? lol