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I skimmed your post, and I think you may find some supportive words in books written from the humanistic perspective and/or person-centered perspective. I am of the ilk that believe in treating the person and not just the Dx. I do not know any specific BPD (Bi-Polar Disorder) books with a person-centered slant, but there is probably something out there.
People have a hard time getting past the label and to where the rubber hits the road. A label is just a term used to get your arms around a generalized idea. Many people define themselves by a number of 'labels'.
Feeling the stigma related to your problems is common. Being involved in a (recovery) group offers support because it brings people together who 'get' each other. There is a slightly different slant to each person....but they get the general idea.
-pedagogue
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"If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn't lead anywhere." - Frank A. Clark
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