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Old 10-13-2013, 01:29 PM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Mentium
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Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: North of England
Posts: 1,442
You make some good points however my primary feelings of antagonism were around the opening remarks of the chair, which I only touched on. He said the group was about to close and laid a very heavy emotional blackmail trip on the gathering. Amongst other things he accused the group of not reaching out to new members. As a new member myself of this (small) group I have in fact been very warmly welcomed, been given lots of phone numbers etc. The financial contributions weren't even enough to 'buy a pint'..and so on..

The guy seemed to me to be unable to share some possibly genuine concerns about the state of the group without recourse to aggression and accusation. I thought about this later and thought about his shares and what they said about his past. He was an aggressive and belligerent sort of person by his own admission and I suspect he has never developed the sort of skills one needs to deal with groups of people and to negotiate effectively. I don't judge him for that, it may just be the case.

After his outburst he then went into a long tale about his own spiritual development which was so at odds with what he had just done that it was almost breathtaking. That did for me.

To address some of your other points - probably the majority of the group do not see AA as spiritual in the traditional sense. Many see personal growth and development as 'spiritual' in some way. And having read a lot very fast in order to get up to speed it is clear that AA intends to be a big tent and really does mean it when it says the only requirement for membership is the desire to stop drinking.

It seems I am not alone in my concerns. Following the meeting (I was told at another in town yesterday) there will be a group conscience meeting before the next of the one this was all about with the intention of voting the guy out of the chair and installing a new person. The whole meeting was pretty appalled it seems by his behaviour. The 9th tradition (which I looked up) does recommend a revolving chair.

One final point: the sense of fellowship and personal/peer support I get for the majority of my time at meetings has so far outweighed the downside by a considerable margin. I'm not sure I would be sober now without face to face meetings. And sadly they are the only game in my particular town.
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