Originally Posted by
Veritas1 
My initial thought is that you achieved sobriety with no sponsor for 4 years.
How do you think you achieved this?
May I also add that I developed many relationships in AA that I thought would ensure caring, and it just didn't happen.
I found that when I drank, they dropped me, fast and hard.
I found there is no friendship, true friendship, in a "sponsor" and that I learned not to rely on any human being.
There are a few people that love me unconditionally and I turn to them.
I think the problem with human relationships is that there are conditions...judgement..
I'll only love you if... I'll only help you if...
boy there is a big difference in being dry and being sober
I have been on so many dry drunks my first go around in AA
I had victim stamped to my forehead
I was so full of self pity and most of it came for refusing to get out of co dependent relationships
I wanted to tell my sad stories I did not want solutions
just because some one goes with out a drink for 4 years does not mean they have taken step one
the example of the guy in the big book who had not drank for 25 years is a good one
but he never accepted he was an alcoholic
he died with in 4 years of returning to drink
AA is not a baby sitting service
I first crawled into AA back in 1982 if I wanted to drink
the good folks at my home group did not try to talk me out of it
they laughed and said
go drink, then if you live through it
come on back and tells us how good it is LOL
I needed my butt kicked I was so messed up back then I could not find my rear end with both hands!
If I knew so much about staying sober on my own I would have 31 years instead of 15
if you are waiting for folks in AA to chase you down you might have a long wait
AA is for folks who want it
not for folks who need it
today I want AA