FireSprite

I've been doing VERY well lately, I think, in prioritizing myself in my family. I've struggled so much (like many of you) with not interpreting my self-care as selfish behavior. Here are some of the changes I've made:


I am doing so much better at detaching & not getting drawn into RAH's dysfunctional orbit, lol. I finally got it through my thick skull (sort of) that when I have no control over the outcome, worrying & stressing over it helps nothing & but ALWAYS hurts me & leaves me emotionally drained.


I have started attending group reiki healing sessions on an almost weekly basis & it has been an INCREDIBLE experience. Reiki is like therapy without having to identify all the hurts & I have yet to walk away from a session without feeling like I've gained something, even just by unburdening some negative energy. The group I go to is pretty unique -any number of healers show up and treat everyone who shows up for healing. I've met so many talented people who use reiki, massage, quantum touch healing, etc. I brought my mom & her friend one week & their own experiences were just as amazing as mine. It's reallllllly helping to peel apart the layers of my emotional onion, kwim? It is the best night of my entire week, hands down!


Ironically, DD9 went with me one night out of desperation (RAH flaked on me at the last minute & I had no one to watch her & I was determined not to let his malfunction affect my progress) and she took to it like a duck to water. I noticed an immediate improvement in her anxiety and she has been taking lessons there every other Saturday ever since. She is learning guided meditation & how to listen to & trust her gut instincts. It has given us lots to talk about & since she's learning it from someone who is a better teacher than I am (lol) I think she is picking it up rather quickly. I can absolutely see her working in this field professionally one day.


I put my foot down about our finances & RAH's impulse spending. Bad enough that his drinking put us in the poor house but I could no longer stand him being so irresponsible & impulsive with *my* money now. I confiscated & shredded his credit & debit cards & have left him to deal with everything in cash. It has caused him some stress, but oh well..... I can't save him from himself & I won't stand by & watch him make a bad situation worse any longer. It is forcing him to learn to budget and work on learning how to better manage money. I was fully honest with him & told him he acts like an irresponsible teen when it comes to spending & me fixing it for him all the time is teaching him nothing. Sink or swim, friend.


DD & I have worked on redecorating an old dollhouse that was gifted to us by a friend of my mom's. It's a handmade house that is nearly 90 years old & working on it has my Inner Child positively GLOWING every time I work on it; I wanted one of these throughout my entire childhood. We turned it into a Fairy House, using crystals, stones, etc to decorate in addition to traditional dollhouse furniture. I have printed the chakra symbols in small 2"x2" pictures to hang on the walls like artwork.


I arranged to work from home 2 days per week over the summer while DD is out of school. She splits the other 3 days with my mom & sis so that is helping us save the cost of summer day camp, she's getting great quality time with everyone & I am removing myself from a very stressful & unfulfilling work environment. I'm also avoiding a long 40 mile round trip commute every day I do that, conserving my fuel & avoiding the anxiety of rush hour traffic. It has been more awesome than I can verbalize over the last 3 weeks. In the fall I will continue to work from home at least once per week. It has made hating my job a bit more palatable, lol.


I convinced one of my good friends (finally) to look into joining a gym with me so when she gets back from vacation next week we're on the hunt for the right one. I'm SUPER excited about this!


I planned a Girls Night In for my few friends for the weekend of the 4th & invited a good friend that reads tarot cards. The girls are SO excited! We're doing apps & drinks & taking turns getting our cards read & our chakras measured. (she has this amazing machine that reads your aura & shows you how open/closed each of the chakra energy centers is. It prints out a great color keepsake & I'm always in awe at it's accuracy.) Sis & I are having fun planning the menu.


This is SO silly but has been another great change - I am drinking the juice from 2-3 fresh lemons every day. I started it because the health benefits of lemons are amazing & I was having digestive issues that I could not fix no matter what I did..... but they disappeared once I happened to start the daily lemon intake so I finally put 2 & 2 together & realized what was happening. After just a couple of weeks I'm also noticing that my skin is getting clearer and my sweet tooth seems tamer.


I started drinking chamomile tea every night before bed instead of having a snack & I am sleeping like a CHAMP, yay!!


So - just thought I'd share some great changes I've been making and remind you all to make time FOR YOU some how, some way. When I first started posting here about a year ago, I couldn't fathom how I could or would be able to make these kinds of changes, but I'm finding that with each one the next one comes easier.