SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information - View Single Post - Depression, crazy mood swings and old memories

Sarah0404 · 12-04-2004, 08:08 PM

I've had depression for years, but it has been getting worse... and I don't know what to do anymore. I hate meds... I can't be on them. I can't handle the side effects... and they don't really benefit me anyway. And I just don't know what's wrong with me. My moods are all over the place. When I finally do feel good about something, I get so terrified. I'm so scared to let myself feel good, 'cause I know that if I feel good, then the next day, I'll be feeling unbelievably horrible. I can't control it. I don't think I can put up with this anymore, but not sure what I can do. I have access to help right now, but I'm moving to a place where I won't be able to get any help or support.... so I don't know what I'm going to do.

And another thing, even though I haven't been using any drugs for months, I'm still haunted by the memories of it. I can't stop thinking about all the horrible stuff that happened during that time... and it makes me feel suicidal. I wish the memories would go away... but they don't, no matter how much I try to push them away.

I wish I could talk to someone online... for support and advice.

12-04-2004, 08:08 PM	#1 (permalink)
Sarah0404 Member Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Canada Posts: 8	Depression, crazy mood swings and old memories I've had depression for years, but it has been getting worse... and I don't know what to do anymore. I hate meds... I can't be on them. I can't handle the side effects... and they don't really benefit me anyway. And I just don't know what's wrong with me. My moods are all over the place. When I finally do feel good about something, I get so terrified. I'm so scared to let myself feel good, 'cause I know that if I feel good, then the next day, I'll be feeling unbelievably horrible. I can't control it. I don't think I can put up with this anymore, but not sure what I can do. I have access to help right now, but I'm moving to a place where I won't be able to get any help or support.... so I don't know what I'm going to do. And another thing, even though I haven't been using any drugs for months, I'm still haunted by the memories of it. I can't stop thinking about all the horrible stuff that happened during that time... and it makes me feel suicidal. I wish the memories would go away... but they don't, no matter how much I try to push them away. I wish I could talk to someone online... for support and advice.