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Old 01-01-2013, 04:22 AM
  # 19 (permalink)  
andisa
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 249
I'm thinking purgatory is a state of mind more so than a state of being.
True, being an edge-teeterer or a fence-sitter or a chicken-in-the-barn-squatter puts us in a state of indecisive limbo, but there can be good, sound reason behind our caution in many areas of life. Keeping options open, maintaining a position of safety, and freedom to choose another way are positive contributors to a well-designed life. So we don't let them go. That we extend those conditions to drug use or other areas of life where they aren't so positive is natural, albeit not productive. Balance!

What I'm getting at here is perhaps we take a step outside this mental state of limbo and look at things a bit different. Beating ourselves up for not being where we want to be then beats us down. We end up feeling like we're not moving forward, or in the direction we want to go. And in some ways it may well be that we're not. I know how I remain stuck, based on fear, and avoidance. Yep, I definitely still live that way. Some of that may never change. But I'm thinking it need not be so much a negative, so incapacitating and draining and consuming as it is. I allow it to be a suppressor.

Maybe if I (we) stop being so hard on ourselves for not being where we want to be, we can then focus my energy on getting to where we want to go. Keeping in mind my general direction, with acceptance of who we and where we are, and with that, proceed more gently forward, cautiously, calculating each move, choosing as wisely as we can.

Acceptance, balance, progress. Those are the words of I focus on.
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