It's so hard not to lose your soul to this. The disease seems hopeless - the odds of relationships making it through recovery (let alone actual recovery itself) make me feel despair.
It's so hard to remember it's THEIR disease when it affects our lives so drastically. I am in awe of the people (and there are a lot) that are genuinely happy despite alcoholism in their household.
We are left with the most awful decision - to live with it or leave - and it often feels like either way...we lose.
Unless - we recover ourselves. In ALL relationships we must at some point make the decision if their "quirks" are worth living with (and they have to make the same one with regards to us.) In that sense, we are somewhat all "normies" i suppose. My A's "quirks" are BIG ones. But they are not worth me sacrificing a happy life over - whether I stay or go.
I just can't thank everyone here enough for being a big part of helping me see - and see that I have a lot of work on myself ahead.