kristelyne, I am sorry this has happened. I am sorry you are so hurting and confused. I have never found, in all of my efforts to "help" all the addicts and alcoholics I have involved myself with and who are in my family, that anything I did actually helped. In fact, I have found quite the opposite; whenever I have helped I have only HURT them. I think the best thing you can do is take the very best care of yourself you possibly can, investigate why you got involved with an alcoholic in the first place, educate yourself about alcoholism and codependence, and work on YOUR needs FIRST.
:codiepolice