| Need help
hi everyone:
just wanted some support from folks out there. i was wondering if folks have been in this situation and wanted to get your input.
i'm getting a bit panicky right now - i'm at work.
me and my SO have been fighting almost every other day for the past 2 weeks and come last sunday - we almost broke up
we talked about it over the phone and it was a long discussion and we decided not to do it.
i know i have obsessive love problems and he occupies a lot of my mental space and i've been trying to wean myself off of him coz he is like a drug to me. he is a recovering Alky/addict - sober for 14 months and active in AA. Anyway -- i've been feeling really insecure as of late thinking that the world has ended and he doesnt like me anymore - we've been fighting so much that he probably feels ill at ease when he's with me. he has said that he's willing to work on it but i am still ill at ease. i feel powerless and bad for nit-picking and criticizing him and just being not the best person.
i dont know if i'm making it up in my head or not but i'm wondering if he is trying to create a space between the two of us . i dont know.my healthy side's telling me that well- you should provide that space and i should find activities to fill my time and leave it to him to find the time to hang out with you. i'm wondering - maybe its a good idea that he hangs out with his fellowhip friends right now as a break or even be by himself to get rest from all our fighting.
but folks -- this is where i need help. i just totally want to call him and ask if everything's allright? apologize profusely and act lame. this is what i want to do in my head but i know i wont coz i know its pathetic sounding but this is what i'm feeling and i'm so ill at ease. just worrying that he doesnt like me and that he'll leave. how does one start over with a person if they've had two weeks of just horrible fighting? i really want this to work out - what have other people done? i feel so...yucky like i've sabotaged the relationship- i may have and we've talked about it but he has said we could still try and work it out -- but how does one handle all the bad recordings going on in my head?
please help - thanks-
codepfree
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