[Redmayne]

So, your point being that as someone, perfectly able to deal with matters affecting your personal and professional life, you felt more than capable with dealing with an alcoholic partner and assisting them in their recovery, hopefully leading to long term sobriety. Is that right?

Not thefirst person, for perfectly natural and understandble reasons who has done that.Some, who I've met have even pursued it to only see, their 'loved one' die!

So, if I've got you correctly, it's perfectly possible for those families, friends,employers of addicts to become 'enablers' believingthat they can lead their alcoholic to sobriety.

Obviously, you know, through expeience, as many members of Al-Anon will tell you, you can't. Any suggestion that you or any others placed in a similar position places you ,'in denial' for as much as many addicts are 'in denial' until they, and they alone, no one else, recognise and accept they have a problem.

Sadly, this often, in the case of an addict, whatever their addiction drugs, alcohol, sex or gambling until they have hit 'rock bottom' a situation peculiar to each one of them!

There are two points that applyto the addict and the enabler, certainly as regards alcohol,

1. the suggested 12 Step ,programme of recovery is a 'selfish programme', equally so the enabler must follow their own 'programme' and no matter how hard it is, 'detach', for otherwise all they do is create misery, for themselves and the alcoholic.

2. As it says in ,'The Big Book', 'remember, we deal with alcohol, cunning, baffling and powerful' and that applies to all who surround it...without prejudice...