Welcome to SR, blackandblue!
I too qualify for ACOA and understand. I have had a long string of dysfunctional relationships, including an abusive ex-husband (now deceased). I finally hit my codependent bottom in 1995 when my then fiance walked out on me. I know now that he was a dry drunk. I was a "fixer" in my relationships.
As Zoso suggested, Alanon is a wonderful source of support. There you will find face-to-face support among those who understand and have been there.
Get your hands on a copy of "Codependent No More" by Melody Beattie. It was a real eye-opener to the patterns I had for years. You can get a used copy pretty cheap through Amazon.
There are a lot of great "sticky" topics at the top of this forum. Read them and educate yourself on addiction.
Again, welcome, and know that you are among friends.