| Help!!!
I have been avoiding people for a while, not going to meetings and not caring much about what happens. I am back in denial I think. I am going to buy beer tonight and drink this weekend. I have fell off anyways. I used Crystal Meth about a month ago, then drank beers with my neighbor 2 weeks ago. I haven't done anything for 2 weeks, but tonight I want to get good and hammered. I got rid of my sponsor and I am avoiding all of my recovery friends. I am too embarrased to call anyone. I don't even know why I decided to write this, probably because I know I should stay away from the mood altering substances, but I don't want to. Its that little devil :saroll: on my shoulder winning out for the past month. I hate him, but he loves me. Sorry to let everyone here down, and sometimes I am sorry that I even exist, but I have to live for my 7-year-old son. Hope everyone here is doing better than me.
jaz
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Practice "self-compassion". Let go of those "stupid" everyday trivial things that can bring a recovering addict to their knees. Its more important to focus on yourself and love yourself even if you do "mess-up a bit". |