How do you know that you are bipolar? I always thought that people suffering from the disease went from episode of great elation, great energy, and great "productivity", to periods of depression when they were incapable of doing much.
As someone who has been suffering from chronic depression, you sound to me like you are horribly depressed. And you would need to see a mental health professional -- a good one, a lot of them are jerks --and get treatment, both through medication therapy and talk therapy. The medication would get you over the edge.
My therapist and my psychopharmacologist saved me from the worse depression I had ever been through. I am still on medication and still in therapy, and I am able to enjoy life most of the time. Right now, I am not a happy camper, but it will pass. I am trying to fight my dependency on alcohol, and my emotional dependency on a man that is downright toxic to me. Eventually, I'll get there.
My pharmacologist is a world-wide reknown scientist who specializes in depression, its causes, and its treatments. He is in New York, but can be contacted. If you want, send me a private message, and I'll be happy to give
you his name and number. I am sure that he knows people in your area who can help you.
You don't have to go through this on your own.
