After over a month of asking my husband to please get into some treatment, please do this for our family (we have two kids age 5 and 7), etc etc--- all the while he kept going out drinking, hiding beer in the house, lying about his drinking, blaming me, and making tons of empty promises. I told him I couldn't do this any further on Friday and he just got up from thetable and told me Im controlling and he doesn't feel the same about me anymore. I said we had to discuss divorce/separation options. Well, on Sunday night I made dinner and my friend/neighbor came over with her kids. I was such an IDIOT!!! I drank with them, not caring because I felt I should be able to enjoy myself with my friend!!! Well, of course the evening progressed and the two of them were quite hammered. I had my wits about me atleast and told what I thought was my best friend/neighbor how upset his drinking made me. She started defending him and saying that maybe I shouldnt be so controlling and confrontational...I said "Seriously? You're defending him?" I told her to leave after we got into it and she wouldn't leave, she literally followed me into my house to tell me what a bad person I am and how my husband drinks because of me. So I asked her to leave again and she wouldn't. I said I would call the police and my husband was telling me not to call cops, that he'd snap my neck, and was restraining me. They finally left as I started dialing...I called cops anyway. She ended up walking out front with my husband and I looked at her phone. Saw they were texting eachother how "bad they want to kiss" and how they should try and get me drunk so they can be together. I was devastated.
I told the police what was going on, they said he should just stay across street. In the morning, they said I should file an emergency Order of protection.
Both of them denied any cheating and said it was texting and just stupid due to the drinking. I dont care nor do I believe them. Either way it was wrong and this is the 3rd time in our ALMOST ten year marriage I have discovered him being unfaithful. He has hurt me too many times and I will never trust him again. She was my friend and all along I was telling her how sick I felt w his drinking, and how sad I was, i would cry to her all the time and she'd tell me how I should try and work on this with him. What a joke. They are both drunk idiots and I am so stupid for even believing she was my friend.
I did file the order of protection the next morning and he was served today...two days later...and he was liivid. Telling me what a horrible person I am that I would prevent my children from seeing him and I am using them as "pawns" and I am so low. I told him perhaps he should have thought about the consequences of his actions, and that I am merely protecting myself and children from further craziness. His is beyond mad and his parents are livid as well and think I'm the crazy one. He said he never would hurt me and I am a liar and made this all up just to get back at him.
I just need some reassurance and advice from anyone who has gone through this...
I am seeing a lawyer tomorrow with my parents and filing for divorce. I am done with the cheating, lies, betrayal...but so sick inside because I know this is the end. It is hard not even communicating with him and I dont know how this will pan out with bills to be paid, etc. This is just the worst and I am so sick inside. I feel like I'm losing my mind!!!
