RRTL

It brings me some peace of mind to have found this website I don’t feel so alone on this. I have been dating my boyfriend for two years now and he is an alcoholic. I am so disappointed in myself my entire youth I promised myself I wouldn’t never date an alcoholic since my father was one. When I first started dating my boyfriend I didn’t know he was an alcoholic until five months into the relationship. I’m not going to lie I had a feeling after a couple of months but I ignored it because he is a great person when he doesn’t drink. When I confronted him he denied it. After five months we had a long talk and he cut down, which I thought for a long time. After one year of dating lots of things changed, emotionally I wasn’t the same anymore, I started developing anxiety .There has been times that he could be so mean verbally when he drinks and the next day he acts like nothing. When we go out by ourselves or with friends 80% of the time he gets really drunk to the point that I have to drive home or get a taxi. The next day he doesn’t remember anything. That’s one of the problems I can’t babysit him all the time. When he drinks hard liquor he doesn’t remember the next day, how can I trust someone like that. Everyone that knows him and I tell me that I am too good for him that he doesn’t treat me how I should be treated, and I know that but don’t know why I stay. I love him and I know he loves me to but that is not enough anymore. I have started counseling to deal with my issues, on why I stay, but I am still in the relationship. If anyone can give me advise on this please. Every night I go to sleep thinking on how much more time can i invest in him. It makes it really hard because I love him, I expect what should be right to me in a relationship but dont feel like its going to happen.