Thank you so much for responding.
I was very sad the first day or two, but I wiped my tears and asked God for His strength. I know that I could not do this alone. I haven't cried since! I feel strong and centered and I'm using this time and experience to reflect and grow as a person. I know he and I can't be in contact for a long time in fear of falling back into old patterns. I guess I am just looking for some answers and comfort. Is his behavior "normal" for an addict. Regardless of his reasons, yes, we are making the right choice to break things off at this very point in our lives. I was just wondering if addicts push people away while they are trying to live a sober and clean life. I always thought I was a positive person in his life, but I'm guessing he thinks I enable his destructive behavior. And when you look at it that way, yes ... he HAS to cut me off. I just always believed this is something we would do together. Even though I have been with him for 5 years, I am naive when it comes to drugs and jail. I didn't know for so long he was using. I BELIEVED in him.