Even if they "realize" they have a problem, that realization doesn't usually last long. My AH randomly admits that he's an alcoholic and has to quit drinking...this is usually followed up by, on average, two weeks of abstinence....sometimes with a good attitude, sometimes with a bad attitude...sometimes so bad, in fact, I just wish he'd have a drink and get it over with...we all know he's going to drink again anyway! How bad is that?!? Other times (particularly after the two weeks that he's "proven" he's not an alcoholic by abstaining), he believes he can only drink on the weekends...this, of course, only lasts for the first weekend b/c he always drinks Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday as well, ad nauseum. Then there are the times that he doesn't care that he's an alcoholic..."he's just not able to be happy enough/get enough enjoyment out of life without it, so he's never going to give it up completely." These three different attitudes have sometimes even been expressed and followed up on within a period of a week or less...mind-boggling! So, can you make them "get it". No! Even when they get it themselves, they don't get it. I mean, I think deep down, my AH knows. He just isn't ready to deal with it yet...