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Old 07-29-2010, 03:46 PM   #1 (permalink)
Lizrox
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 677
The papers were signed today.

My post-nuptial agreement was signed today. I am upset but will get over it. Thank you for all the replies and advice. At the end I just realized if I didn't sign I would hardly be able to see my soon to be 6 year old. I wouldn't get much with a divorce either. What would hurt the most would be losing my daughter.

The courts do favor the custodial parent. When it comes to a divorce; they really don't care about the adults involved in the case; it is really "what is in the best interest of the child" This hurts to admit but the best interest of my little girl right now is with her dad. I have scr#@d up so many times; maybe I should feel lucky my husband is giving me this last chance to get my act together.

If we went to court/mediation-

1. Hubby will get primary custody of my daughter, I would see her only a few times a year
2. I may get health insurance--but I would be living in NY with my parents and my husband's plan doesn't cover out of state benefits
3. I know I wouldn't get much, if any alimony

My husband is a CPA and makes decent money but the bills do add up; I don't work and our house is "under water."

I did talk to my dad ( a lawyer) and I do plan to see a lawyer in a few months; just to ask some questions. Questions like- Can the papers be annulled, "changed", how hard is it to prove duress? That kind of stuff. I did sign the papers only a month after being "baker acted." I also signed only 4 months after my sister died.

There is a clause in there that does say if I saw my husband making "wrong decisions" I can go back to court. I need to find a lawyer to represent ME now.

If the marriage fails, I will just have to claim "duress". The lawyer I saw said duress is hard to prove and also expensive. He said no one was putting a gun to my head to sign the papers; but I WAS just out of detox (being baker acted). He did say those factors would hold up in court.

I do love my husband; and I also feel if he really loved me he want to provide more if we divoced but it was a no go. Also if the papers weren't signed; he would have divorced me. There was really no winning here really.

At the end I did it for my daughter and myself. At least my husband is providing me with a home where I can focus on recovery; and the chance to see my daughter every day.

It was such a hard decision; I hope some people understand WHY I did sign. It was sort of a contraversial (sp) topic. At the end I just couldn't find myself living without my little girl.

What's done is done.. You can't change the past; only the future.
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