| SIGNS THAT RONALD MCDONALD HAS GROWN UP
SIGNS THAT RONALD MCDONALD HAS GROWN UP
- No longer signs paychecks in crayon.
- That new "Mr. Happy Meal."
- Distinctive odor of bourbon and stale cigars at personal appearances.
- Two words: sagging buns.
- Replacing floppy red shoes with floppy black wingtips.
- Now offering "Happy Hour" Meals.
- No longer asks women if they want to see his McNuggets.
- Instead of size 46 shoe, now takes a size 62.
- Gin has replaced make-up as his nose-reddener.
- That telltale bottle of Clairol Fire Engine Red #4 in his shower.
- Seen with Jack-in-the-Box at strip clubs stuffing fries down g-strings.
- Three kids injured in unfortunate stubble incident.
- Has a McBeergut.
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