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qwe · 03-10-2010, 01:53 PM

Hi Lulu,

Welcome and hugs. I am a newbie here so do not have much expertise to share; others vastly more knowledgeable will be by soon I am sure.

So glad you are going to Al-Anon, I find that really helps. SR also helps so much, there are so many people here who know our situations from both sides of the fence. Keep coming back and posting. Reading the many stories here I have also found help me a lot.

So sorry to read of your sitatuion, you must feel very hurt and anxious. My initial thinking, reading your story is that this may be another control tactic. Perhaps, given your Catholic, no-divorce stance, threatening you with it will bring you back in line where you will take him back and then let him continue with his preferred behaviours? On the other hand, if it is not a control tactic, and he is now dating, how do you feel about infidelity being added to the drinking? Just like with the drinking, we cannot control any of their behaviour, really. Hard and painful as that may be.

Take care and keep writing! More support coming, I'm sure of that, knowing this group!

03-10-2010, 01:53 PM	#5 (permalink)
qwe Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 56	Hi Lulu, Welcome and hugs. I am a newbie here so do not have much expertise to share; others vastly more knowledgeable will be by soon I am sure. So glad you are going to Al-Anon, I find that really helps. SR also helps so much, there are so many people here who know our situations from both sides of the fence. Keep coming back and posting. Reading the many stories here I have also found help me a lot. So sorry to read of your sitatuion, you must feel very hurt and anxious. My initial thinking, reading your story is that this may be another control tactic. Perhaps, given your Catholic, no-divorce stance, threatening you with it will bring you back in line where you will take him back and then let him continue with his preferred behaviours? On the other hand, if it is not a control tactic, and he is now dating, how do you feel about infidelity being added to the drinking? Just like with the drinking, we cannot control any of their behaviour, really. Hard and painful as that may be. Take care and keep writing! More support coming, I'm sure of that, knowing this group!