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Welcome Lulu.
Do you wish to remain married to him?
It might be a good idea to read up on addiction. Unless he seeks treatment and recovery, the way he is now is the best he will ever be. It sounds like things were bad enough that you did not want to keep living with him? That won't get better, so I think you are just fighting the idea that HE is detaching from you - forgetting that you choose not to live with him.
Divorce hurts and causes so many painful feelings, but you might try feeling that pain and learning from it, instead of keeping on trying to reach out to your AH. He can't and won't solve your broken heart over the end of your marriage.
Good luck.
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