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**Impurrfect** · 03-06-2010, 06:47 PM

((Endangered)) - I'm sorry you're having a rough time. I'm an RA as well as a recovering codie. I came here with a lot of resentments, some were to my 3 XABF's but most were at myself. I can even understand you on the teeth...unfortunately, I did the damage myself with my using of crack.

I've never gone to an al-anon meeting, but I've spent hours and hours here, and I'm blessed to have a few people in my life who are not codies that I can talk to. It took me a while of reading her and letting things sink in before I could get past the resentment toward myself. Makes life pretty miserable, I tell ya....it's not like you can get away from yourself!

The thing is, most of the stuff I had to work out in my head was CODIE stuff....yes, I am an addict and I've done some things I regret....I've done things I regret for many MORE years as a codie.

When I get to that point now, where I'm angry and fed up, or overwhelmed I have to stop and find out what is MY part in this...put myself back in my hula hoop. I have to figure out exactly what I can do about it, right now, maybe tomorrow. I've had to learn some lessons about humility thanks to this economy and my own errors. I've gotten down about them, at times, but I choose to believe that they are part of a path I'm meant to walk and as soon as I learn the lesson I'm meant to learn, I'll move onto a better path....at least that's what my history has shown thus far.

I'm really sorry you're left with all this to deal with.

Big hugs and prayers!

Amy

03-06-2010, 06:47 PM	#4 (permalink)
Impurrfect Social Network Moderator Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Atlanta Posts: 25,186	((Endangered)) - I'm sorry you're having a rough time. I'm an RA as well as a recovering codie. I came here with a lot of resentments, some were to my 3 XABF's but most were at myself. I can even understand you on the teeth...unfortunately, I did the damage myself with my using of crack. I've never gone to an al-anon meeting, but I've spent hours and hours here, and I'm blessed to have a few people in my life who are not codies that I can talk to. It took me a while of reading her and letting things sink in before I could get past the resentment toward myself. Makes life pretty miserable, I tell ya....it's not like you can get away from yourself! The thing is, most of the stuff I had to work out in my head was CODIE stuff....yes, I am an addict and I've done some things I regret....I've done things I regret for many MORE years as a codie. When I get to that point now, where I'm angry and fed up, or overwhelmed I have to stop and find out what is MY part in this...put myself back in my hula hoop. I have to figure out exactly what I can do about it, right now, maybe tomorrow. I've had to learn some lessons about humility thanks to this economy and my own errors. I've gotten down about them, at times, but I choose to believe that they are part of a path I'm meant to walk and as soon as I learn the lesson I'm meant to learn, I'll move onto a better path....at least that's what my history has shown thus far. I'm really sorry you're left with all this to deal with. Big hugs and prayers! Amy __________________ "I'm not where I want to be, but thank God I'm not where I used to be" - Joyce Meyer "You got what it takes you can win, today is your day to begin. - Shania Twain (Tinker, Elvis [RIP], Patches and Mots - Mouth Of The South)